Why Do We Pretend?

Why do we pretend like adult professionals don't need help learning? The cycle of undeveloped leaders producing more undeveloped leaders has to break somewhere.

By Dr. Latisha Chisholm — February 16, 2026

"Why do we pretend like adult professionals don't need help learning?

I keep hearing from seasoned leaders that there's no time for coaching or development. Developing others is almost a taboo topic. And it makes me wonder: why are they lying?

I think they are pretending because it is easier than admitting a skill deficit. Many of them had to struggle to gain their position without true development, and they never learned how to develop others effectively.

But that's not my story.

I'm a social worker before anything. Interning and deep, reflective supervision is non-negotiable. You don't enter the field without someone walking alongside you, pushing your thinking, helping you examine your own biases and blind spots. That's the culture.

Then I'm a special educator. A former English department chair. Teachers teach one another every day if they are lucky enough to thrive in a meaningful school culture. We observe each other. We debrief. We challenge each other's practice. Development isn't a quarterly event, it's the air you breathe.

So when I moved to nonprofit work, my default was to bring that with me:

Embedding team development in my meeting structures Meeting culture around stages of team development Bringing in book studies to support skill building Sending team members for project management training

You know what I learned? We have time to develop our people. We always had time. Instead, we waste it trying everything under the sun to interrupt low productivity or lackluster culture except the one thing that actually works: professional development.

Here is what I think is really happening.

Your leaders don't know how to develop you. And they don't have the professional development funding because it is not prioritized. And the cycle feeds itself. Those who struggled without development produce more people who struggle without development.

This is one of the reasons I built Subversive Leader. Because the cycle has to break somewhere. And it can start with one person deciding they deserve to be developed, even if no one around them is offering it.

---

What's your experience? Have you ever had a leader who genuinely invested in your growth? What made it different? And if you haven't, what do you think was missing?

Drop your thoughts in the comments."